| Location | Edgware |
| Age | 1 year, 8 months |
| Cause of Death | Not Listed? |
| Date of Birth | 29/06/2006 |
| Date of Death | 29/02/2008 |
| Visitors | 3,143 since 02/05/2008 |
| Creator | |
| Helpers |
YOU WAS THE LIGHT IN OUR LIFE'S NOW YOUR LIGHT IS IN THE SKY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Robert christopher sampson was born on the 29th of june 2006 , by emergancy c section at 10:46pm
and weighed 1.42kg, he was 11 weeks and 1 day early and hadn't been due until 15th september.
He was doing ok to start with and his problems began in the early hours of saturday morning, when
his lung collapsed and instead of cpap which he had been on already, he had to be ventilated and
that is where it all started to go wrong ,for starters they struggled to reinflate his lung and was
on high pressures and 94% oxygen, and his chances didnt look that good , infact the doctors told us
he could go at any time, but they didnt know how strong his will to live was, and despite everything
happening to him which by the monday included a grade 4 ivh, (the worst grade a brain bleed can be)
and also bleeding into his lungs he clung desperatly to stay with us he sure amazed the doctors who
called him a true miricle as they had never seen a baby survive against those odds before (less then
5%).
As if that wasnt bad enough he went on to develop septicimia, as well as hydrocephulus,(water on the
brain).
On many occasions we was told by the doctors that his brain was very badly damaged and he would be
very very disabled even if he managed to survive, which they was doubtful that he would, they told
us that all we was doing was prolonging the inevitable and it would be kinder to turn of his life
support and let him slip away, well im sorry if he had already got through so much and was still
hanging in then it wasnt for me to take that away from him. The way i looked at it was when he could
take no more and had had enough then no matter what machines he was on, he would let
well by the time bobby was six weeks and still with us, (although most
days he needed to be bagged at least 5 or 6 times a day,) this was down to the growing pressure on
his brain which by this point had gone from 27cms at birth to a massive 39cms, and this was despite
having his head tapped daily to stop it growing further.
Doctors had to face facts bobby wanted to live, and
at this point they finally started to pursue great ormond street fitting a shunt.
I was told the reason it was left so long was because he had had such a massive bleed that a shunt
would have blocked if it had been done sooner, but i believe that they didnt expect him to still be
around by this point, and he wouldnt have been if id let them have their way,anyway on the 14th
august bobby had his first shunt fitted, and there was a noticable differance straight away not just
the size of his head but his heartrate bp sats all looked a lot better.
For the first time since his problems began he didnt need regular bagging, he was still ventilated,
but doing so much better, our brave little soldier sure showed them doubters, anyway to cut a long
story short (as id be here for the next fortnight writing this) .
Because he was ventilated for so long and needed the tube changed quite a bit he sustained severe
scarring to his windpipe which meant every time they tried to get him of the vent, his windpipe
would swell so badly hed stop breathing and need venting again,so from august until mid october he
went through several attempts to reconstruct and widen his damaged windpipe/larnyx, and hed be ok
for a few days, then it would all start again. That was until bobby made them do something a bit
more permanant, how you might ask well bobby decided to give up his fight, and by this i mean his
heart stopped, not just his usual apneas which we'd grown used to, well after what seemed like ages
they finally got him back, and decided that unless he had a tracky this could keep happening, and
despite it scaring the hell out of us, we had to give him a chance, after all hed been through.
Bobby was a true soldier and i know that he tried so hard to stay with us, in the end before he
gained his wings hed gone through 17 operations, and only made it home for 5 short weeks, in his 20
months, he was so strong and fought so very hard against constant obstacles that kept getting in his
way, he proved all the docs wrong and went on to drink from bottles and have solids and boy did he
love his dummy.
Even right at the very end and drugged up to his eyeballs on a cocktail of drugs that would have put
an adult into the land of nod, just so you understand how strong his will to live was, bobby was on
subcut morphine and midaz, and he was on huge doses were he'd built up such a tolerance, on top of
that he had methadone and ketemine aswell as haloperidal, basically flying, but as soon as his dummy
fell out hed go mental until you put it back in for him.
He had everyone me doctors nurses wrapped round hs finger, that is what i believe made him hang on
for so long all the love, and kisses and cuddles he got from everyone, the nurses would fight over
who was looking after him, id pop 4 a shower and they would steal him for cuddles, bobby going had
such a huge impact on so many lives, he broke so many hearts, but i know his poor tired body had had
enough, he'd put up such a fight and done his mummy and daddy proud. We couldnt have asked him to go
on any longer he was in so much pain and had wasted away to a tiny 8lbs 7 oz when he left us, the
images of his poor little body will haunt me for the rest of my life, but he was and will always be
my very own little superhero, its in his name you see Bravest Of Babies BOB.
xxxxxxxxxxR.I.P. Bravest Of Babies xxxxxxxxxx
In loving memory of a very special son, far too special for earth,bobby we are so grateful for the
20 months you gave us.
we wish it had been a lot longer but you did us proud! thankyou son, you will never ever be
replaced, you really was one in a million, and we all miss you so much, we are just pleased you are
no longer in pain, until we meet again baby sweet dreams baby love always mummy and daddy xxxxx
sammie and luke,your brother and sister miss you so much too, nanny and grandad miss seeing you to,
babe infact everyone who met you misses you as you were 1 VERY special little soldier xxxxx
i miss you so much bobby xx
i cant sleep yet again,cant stop thinking about you, reliving those final few hours and wondering if there was something i could have done, i wish we could swap places, you fought so hard to be here and me im im forever wishing i was dead, i dont deserve my place here you do, and i wish it was me that went that day, ive been a complete failure all my life, always doing something wrong or upsetting someone, i try so hard bobby to make people like me but i just end up making them hate me, i just want to be loved and wanted so much, and not by some sicko, i put a brave face on and try and make out it doesnt hurt, but it does bobby real real bad, to know that your unloveable and not be able to do a thing about it, everyone just thinks im totally mad, your daddy just tells me to shutup stop crying, and thinks im attention seeking and that i couldnt possibly still be hurting that much from losing you, i sometimes wonder if he actually realises what i went through with you night after night, on my own with no support from him, and he actually wonders why i used to be so angry and hurt all the time, i still cant believe he blames me for him not spending more time with you, i mean even when he was there he used to go straight to sleep and wouldnt even hear you when your alarms were going off, 8 oclock on the dot every nite if he was there, that was it off he went home regardless as to how you was, resps could be 6, temp of 34degrees heartrate of 45bpm and if i so much as said anything all i got was oh yeah your such a hero arent you, like i only stayed to score points or something,not because you was my son and i loved you so much, and wanted to spend every last minute with you, i mean how unreal is that, i wish i could have just gone home sometimes and shut off from you like you didnt excist, but unlike him i used to feel bad leaving you even for a minute to go for a fag, ive never loved or cared for anyone as much as i did for you, i could tell you everything, and all you wanted was your dummy and cuddles, i will never feel that sort of love again, you was my son in a million, far to beautiful for this ugly horrible world, and i will just have to wait here until we can be reunited forever, and hope i dont have to long to wait, goodnite my very special little boy, mummy loves and misses you more each day xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
oh bobby xxx
ive just been to your memorial service, it was so lovely charlotte was there to for her angel jake, its so hard without you bobby everyone is rushing around the place all happy and cheery and all i want to do is curl up in a ball until christmas is over, i hope you like your pillow and new vase and xmas tree, i wish so much bobby that you was still here with us all goodnite bobby got to go getting all weepy again sorry love and missing you loads sweet dreams my baby boy xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
cant do it anymore bobby xxxx
I cant go on anymore bobby nothing is the same without you here, your daddy doesnt care about me ive tried and tried and he just doesnt understand or even care how low im feeling, losing you was bad but then to lose another has left me totally empty i keep drinking to numb it but thats only ok until i sober up, your daddy didnt even go to the hospital with me,
i went on my own, i cant do anything right bobby, he always ends up screaming at me, tells me im to needy
and i properbly am but your daddy is just so cold, i wonder if ive ever meant anything at all, im sorry baby for coming on here and going on like this, but ive always told you everything, you kept all my secrets when it was just you and me night after night, i miss you more now then ever and im just so tired now baby i have nothing left inside to give, please bobby stop saving me i need to be with you, so sorry bobby i really am i will always love you and your daddy but i have neither let me come home please xxxx
christmas wont be the same without you xxx
i bet your having a rite giggle up there arent you, mummy just sat and wrote you an essay and just as i had finished it battery died, well bobby mummy is half asleep now so im going to have to come back later and write it all again, you little monkey xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
*
___________________H ello
__________________I Have
_________________Com e Here
________________To Wish You
_______________Merry Christmas
______________And Also, A Happy
_____________New Year To You For
____________2009... I Hope The New
___________Year Brings You Loads Of
__________Happiness And Lots Of Fun.
_________I Hope You Have A Nice Day On
________Christmas Day, Filled With Lots Of
_______Angel Time.......And Of Course Eating
______Lots Of Nice Foods, And Candies. I Hope
_____That Santa Is Good To You As Well And He
___Brings You Loads Of Presents On Christmas Day
_________________XXX (\ ●♥● /)
_________________XXX ( \(_)/ )
_________________XXX (_ /|\ _)
_________________XXX ../___\
sending you lots of love and hugs for christmas xxxxxxx
THIS TRIBUTE IS FOR FRIDAY BUSY DAY FOR ME
Have A Good Weekend Everyone
If I Knew
If I knew it would be the last time
That I'd see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.
If I knew it would be the last time
that I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
and call you back for one more.
If I knew it would be the last time
I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would video tape each action and word,
so I could play them back day after day.
If I knew it would be the last time,
I could spare an extra minute
to stop and say "I love you,"
instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.
If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
well I'm sure you'll have so many more,
so I can let just this one slip away.
For surely there's always tomorrow
to make up for an oversight,
and we always get a second chance
to make everything just right.
There will always be another day
to say "I love you,"
And certainly there's another chance to say
our "Anything I can do?"
But just in case I might be wrong,
and today is all I get,
I'd like to say how much I love you
and I hope we never forget.
Tomorrow is not promised to anyone,
young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance
you get to hold your loved one tight.
So if you're waiting for tomorrow,
why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes,
you'll surely regret the day,
That you didn't take that extra time
for a smile, a hug, or a kiss
and you were too busy to grant someone,
what turned out to be their one last wish.
So hold your loved ones close today,
and whisper in their ear,
Tell them how much you love them
and that you'll always hold them dear
Take time to say "I'm sorry,"
"Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."
And if tomorrow never comes,
you'll have no regrets about today.
Thoughts Today Memories Forever
Angela(Christopher-John Rowe)Mum
Have A Good Weekend Everyone
This Tribute Is For Friday Got Busy Day Tomorrow
Right now I'm in a different place
And though we seem apart
I'm closer than I ever was
... I'm there inside your heart
I'm with you when you greet each day
And while the sun shines bright
I'm there to share the sunsets, too
... I'm with you every night
I'm with you when the times are good
To share a laugh or two,
And if a tear should start to fall
... I'll still be there for you
And when that day arrives
That we no longer are apart,
I'll smile and hold you close to me
... Forever
If Roses grow in Heaven,
Lord please pick a bunch for me
Place them in my Loved One’s arms
And tell them they're from me
Tell them I love and miss them
And when they turns to smile
Place a kiss upon their cheeks
And hold them for awhile
Because remembering them is easy,
I do it every day
But there's an ache within my heart
Because I am missing them today...
Although death has separated us physically,
Faith and love have bound us eternally.
Though we cannot see you,
We know you are here.
Though we cannot touch you,
We feel the warmth of your smile,
As we begin a new chapter in our lives.
Today we pause to reflect upon
Those who have shaped our character,
Molded our spirits and touched our hearts.
May the lighting of this tribute be a
Reminder of the memories we have shared,
A representation of the everlasting
Impact you have made upon our lives.
Thoughts Today Memories Forever
Angela(Christopher-John Rowe)Mum
Thursday
For Friday
poem 4 you bobby xxx
I see tears fall down your face
When your thoughts have turned to me.
Just know that I’m in heaven,
With my Lord, who’s set me free.
No pain or sadness do I feel,
For God is by my side.
The beauty here in Heaven
Is now where I reside.
I know it’s hard for you to cope
For you can’t feel my touch.
But every moment, I can see
And love you very much.
When you are at your lowest
And feel you can’t go on,
Look towards the heavens
The light will be turned on.
Talk to me, just like you did
On earth when I was there.
You see, I’m not so far away …
Only as far as a prayer.
And when it’s time for you to join
Me up in Heaven above.
It’s then that you will realize,
The Golden Place of love.
For here there is no sadness,
Just everlasting light.
Someday we will be joined again,
When it’s time to take your flight.
my little man xxx
hi baby, hope u like your balloon baby, its a little light 4 you, 4 all the light you bought 2 our lifes, joshuas got 1 to, i so hope you have found each other up in heaven as you two brave little boys had such a battle down here i hope your both having so much fun up there, laughing and playing at us silly billys down here, i still miss you so much baby and with christmas coming up dont know how im going to get through it without you here, its going to be hard, mummys so sorry shes not on here as much as usual but so tired all the time just lately, but i think about you all the time xxxxxxx hugs and kisses bobby sent to you babe
sorry bobby xxx
sorry my little man, mummy been feeling really low lately and coming on here would have been 2 upseting but it doesnt mean i havnt been thinking of you and all your angel friends, mummy wants you 2 know i am so pleased with my present from you baby and just to tell you it wont ever replace you as you were 1 in a million, and no1 will ever take your place your in my heart forever xxxx
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